Ho Hum. Random List.

I've been really busy lately with work and classes and just ... stuff. People coming into town, or random deadlines that have to be met for random projects and stuff I've agreed to do. And generally speaking, all of these are things I really want to do, or people I want to see or be able to help out with, but it's definitely been a sprint the last few months. I feel like it'll be crazy up until June, when I take the LSAT, simply because so much of my free time is now dedicated to LSAT stuff by necessity. But I still intend to make the most of the upcoming year. So lately I've been thinking about a few things that I'd like to ... be/change/do this year. (That sounds strange, but I can't quite think how to word this.) Basically, there are some things I wish were different about myself, and in the tradition of Jo's "Everything Will Change At A Completely Arbitrary Point In Time" way of thinking, I've decided there's no arbitrary time like the present one to start trying to be the person I'd like to be. 1) Love New York more. The past week the weather has been pretty nice, and I've been trying to walk around the city more and take pictures and stuff. (Although in practice basically this means I wandered through NY on Friday night at 1 am, in heels, and now my feet hurt.) I'm always so focused on getting somewhere, and had never wanted to be one of those people who stops on Broadway and whips out their camera or cranes their neck to look around ... but I realized I've lived here almost 4 years, and it's only now that I'm starting to feel like it's my city or my home. I guess I've never thought of NY with any permanence, and since we moved so much as a kid I was used to thinking of "home" as just the place where you happen to live. I've never felt particular emotional attachment for a physical home, much less a location; Philly's probably been the strongest til now, and even that had an inherently transitory feel to it. I'd like to, you know, know and love my city a little more. This summer I want to try to see more of Brooklyn and Queens, too. 2) Wear cute dresses and summer clothes. Eh, I guess this comes down to a "like my body and be less ashamed" of it kind of thing. It can be kind of hard when you live in a city where the standards are so high and unforgiving, and there are so many exquisitely-dressed people around. But I'd like to stop feeling like I'm just suffering through summers and doing the minimum to look presentable, which means I need to just get over my scar issues and my body type issues and all that other BS. (Although, I mean, also losing 9 million pounds is part of this goal. I am sure that will help.) 3) Be more creative. I'm always talking about wishing I could write more or whatever. I'm going to try to just ... do it, and make the time. Write more stories. Submit stuff, maybe. 4) Say yes to everything. Um, don't get me wrong, but you know what I mean here. I'm always so cautious about life and people, and I don't want to regret missing opportunities, or not living life fully, just because I was scared of looking gauche or feeling awkward or possibly embarrassing myself. So invite me to do stuff. I'll try to say yes.